Why I Feel Numb Instead of Anxious
Trauma, Dissociation, and Nervous System Shutdown
Many people come to therapy saying:
“I don’t feel anxious anymore. I don’t really feel anything.”
This can be confusing and scary. People worry that something is wrong with them or that therapy is not working.
But emotional numbness is not a failure.
It is a nervous system survival response.
Emotional Numbness Can be a Trauma Response
Stress does not always show up as anxiety or panic. When stress is intense, chronic, or inescapable, the nervous system may stop activating and begin shutting down.
This state can look like:
Emotional numbness or flatness
Feeling disconnected from your body
Dissociation or zoning out
Low motivation or energy
Feeling unreal or detached from life
From a trauma-informed perspective, numbness is protective. Your nervous system is trying to reduce overload.
Fight, Flight, and Shutdown
When the body senses danger, it typically moves into fight or flight. This is when anxiety, hypervigilance, and panic appear. But when threat feels overwhelming or is long-lasting, the nervous system may shift into shutdown (vasal vagal freeze response). Shutdown lowers sensation and emotional intensity. It helps the body conserve energy when escape or resolution does not feel possible. This is why anxiety can fade, and numbness can take its place.
Why Numbness Is Common in Complex Trauma
Complex trauma involves repeated or relational threat, often without a clear way out. Over time, the nervous system learns that staying activated does not lead to safety. So it adapts.
From a Somatic Experiencing lens, numbness reflects a low-arousal survival state.
From an EMDR perspective, it can involve dissociation or emotional distancing.
From an IFS-informed view, protective parts may limit access to feeling to prevent overwhelm.
Different frameworks. Same conclusion. Your system adapted to survive.
Why Emotional Numbness Feels So Disturbing
Many people say numbness feels worse than anxiety. Anxiety still feels alive. Numbness feels like an absence. People often fear they will never feel joy, connection, or motivation again. Shame and self-criticism commonly follow. But numbness does not mean emotions are gone. It means they are being held back by a protective nervous system response. Even good emotions are being blocked, so things that used to bring some joy are now gone.
Healing Does Not Mean Forcing Emotion
Trying to push yourself to feel more usually increases shutdown.
Effective trauma therapy focuses on safety and pacing, not emotional pressure.
Healing often involves:
Increasing body awareness slowly
Tracking sensation without overwhelm
Supporting nervous system regulation
Respecting protective responses
In trauma work, numbness is not something to eliminate. It is something to understand.
If you would like to work with one of our trauma specialists, click below for a free 15-minute consultation.
